Written By Katarina
June 19, 2018, 8:35 p.m.(1/16/1009 AR)
Example One: One does not have to say they are, "Fine and well." There are a number of responses to be given to achieve the desired effect of not brokering any discussions on her current emotional duress. It is one's choice whether they lie or not, and to what degree, Countess Keaton.
Example Two: The reason behind someone offering you unsolicited advice matters not. Although you do not feel grateful for the advice, there are also responses one can give that acknowledges the receipt of it without falling into the trap of false platitudes.
Managing such responses are not an easy feat, mind you. I often find myself acknowledging what is said to me and saying nothing more on it out of fear of causing offense or a desire to be spared of having to deal with a source of aggravation more than I have to.
I do not know that the term of social contract is necessarily the appropriate application for the situation, so much as unspoken social habits & cues we've taken from previous generations simply because we've witnessed it. If that makes sense?
Example Two: The reason behind someone offering you unsolicited advice matters not. Although you do not feel grateful for the advice, there are also responses one can give that acknowledges the receipt of it without falling into the trap of false platitudes.
Managing such responses are not an easy feat, mind you. I often find myself acknowledging what is said to me and saying nothing more on it out of fear of causing offense or a desire to be spared of having to deal with a source of aggravation more than I have to.
I do not know that the term of social contract is necessarily the appropriate application for the situation, so much as unspoken social habits & cues we've taken from previous generations simply because we've witnessed it. If that makes sense?
Written By Coraline
June 19, 2018, 8:35 p.m.(1/16/1009 AR)
Relationship Note on Fairen
Dearest cousin, I get the feeling that conversation with him would be both incredibly amusing and ultimately doomed. Besides, as handsome as I think he is I don't know that he would be any more pleased to be in a dress than I would.
Written By Coraline
June 19, 2018, 8:33 p.m.(1/16/1009 AR)
Nibbles McPita, my dashing mount, has decided that my head looks like a salt lick. I offer apples, I offer carrots, I offer anything I can think of, and while each of these is accepted with apparent enjoyment, winter stored though they may be, at the most inopportune times he decides to lick the back of my head. He still has a fascination with lipping my clothing, and has taken to prancing with me on his back, seriously....prancing. I thought he was older than colt stage but I think he is the eternal youth from what I have seen.
Still, when it is work time that horse /works/. I think if I were any enemy seeing him charging at me, I would run and keep on running. I just wish he would tone down the overly excited thing. I think he was trying to walk through the stall when I saw him this morning, it was a very good day for a ride though. That crisp winter air and the snow he seems to love snuffle in and bounce around on, it was a very cheerful and tired warhorse who went back to his warm hay and oats.
Still, when it is work time that horse /works/. I think if I were any enemy seeing him charging at me, I would run and keep on running. I just wish he would tone down the overly excited thing. I think he was trying to walk through the stall when I saw him this morning, it was a very good day for a ride though. That crisp winter air and the snow he seems to love snuffle in and bounce around on, it was a very cheerful and tired warhorse who went back to his warm hay and oats.
Written By Fairen
June 19, 2018, 8:32 p.m.(1/16/1009 AR)
Relationship Note on Coraline
Perhaps you could convince your partner to wear a fancy dress, while you wear a fancy tunic and trousers. As a form of exchange between the two of you.
Written By Coraline
June 19, 2018, 8:27 p.m.(1/16/1009 AR)
I can honestly say I never dreamed of weddings as a child. In fact, I usually drowned out all of those conversations with imaginary sword battles in my head while whoever it was droned on and on about the whole process. I did that a lot.....yes it was probably not the wisest course of action but hey, that stuff was boring! Anyway, now I find myself in a position of needing to figure out how this all works. Sorrel was very kind and suggested armor, which I immediately fell in love with, but I probably shouldn't because...well...Thrax.
So, I refuse to wear a dress unless a reason so incredibly persuasive manages to convince me that that idea is even in the realm of reality. As such what to wear to this thing? I am tempted to wear my usual tunic and trousers, I mean they function well enough on any other day, but I get the feeling that probably won't fly. So I likely need a fancier version to wear, but I have like one fashion and I am happy with that fashion normally so never had to think of another one. I am open to ideas and suggestions that do not involve skirts and dresses or showing off skin. Including my apparently irresistible ankles.
So, I refuse to wear a dress unless a reason so incredibly persuasive manages to convince me that that idea is even in the realm of reality. As such what to wear to this thing? I am tempted to wear my usual tunic and trousers, I mean they function well enough on any other day, but I get the feeling that probably won't fly. So I likely need a fancier version to wear, but I have like one fashion and I am happy with that fashion normally so never had to think of another one. I am open to ideas and suggestions that do not involve skirts and dresses or showing off skin. Including my apparently irresistible ankles.
Written By Reigna
June 19, 2018, 8:06 p.m.(1/16/1009 AR)
Relationship Note on Katarina
I tend to be in agreement with you on this, Princess Katarina. The person with the moral fortitude to give a painful but honest answer rather than the easier lie is the person who is more trustworthy. However, in this particular scenario, I was thinking something a bit less... dire.
When there is no real stake to the words, is it better to conform to socially expected falsehoods or instead maintain that brutal honesty. An example:
Our subject, let us call her... Lana. She is having a horrendous day. She has argued with her lover and feels wronged. She was dressed down by someone over something that she did in fact do incorrectly, though from Lana's perspective there was no other alternative. She runs into her High Lord in the market and when she is asked how she is... does she risk admitting that she is having a bad day and opening the conversation to additional questioning that leads to embarrassing topics, or does she simply say that she is fine and well?
Or, in another example, someone offers a suggestion that is both improbable and unhelpful, not from a desire to help, but because they simply feel that they know more than you do. Do you thank them, though you do not feel gratitude, or do you generate a conflict because they have irritated you?
I agree with your assessment that lies are most often based from self-interest. Avoiding trouble, shifting blame etc. But is the social contract of politeness an acceptable reason to force a smile, nod your head and avoid conflict if there is no real reason to start one?
I grapple with this at times. I do not like upsetting people. But I also do not like to lie. This often gets me in trouble, here within the whites.
When there is no real stake to the words, is it better to conform to socially expected falsehoods or instead maintain that brutal honesty. An example:
Our subject, let us call her... Lana. She is having a horrendous day. She has argued with her lover and feels wronged. She was dressed down by someone over something that she did in fact do incorrectly, though from Lana's perspective there was no other alternative. She runs into her High Lord in the market and when she is asked how she is... does she risk admitting that she is having a bad day and opening the conversation to additional questioning that leads to embarrassing topics, or does she simply say that she is fine and well?
Or, in another example, someone offers a suggestion that is both improbable and unhelpful, not from a desire to help, but because they simply feel that they know more than you do. Do you thank them, though you do not feel gratitude, or do you generate a conflict because they have irritated you?
I agree with your assessment that lies are most often based from self-interest. Avoiding trouble, shifting blame etc. But is the social contract of politeness an acceptable reason to force a smile, nod your head and avoid conflict if there is no real reason to start one?
I grapple with this at times. I do not like upsetting people. But I also do not like to lie. This often gets me in trouble, here within the whites.
Written By Mirari
June 19, 2018, 8:01 p.m.(1/16/1009 AR)
Someone go in on a bet with me that Victus and Talen end up in a fist fight among the teapots? Please?
This can only end well.
This can only end well.
Written By Victus
June 19, 2018, 7:34 p.m.(1/16/1009 AR)
I'm going to a tea party.
At the Velenosa Estate.
... Hm.
At the Velenosa Estate.
... Hm.
Written By Katarina
June 19, 2018, 7:19 p.m.(1/16/1009 AR)
One could say that most lies are borne out of self-centered desires, rather than true consideration for the feelings of the other party. As children, we often lie out of self-preservation or selfishness; either to get out of trouble or try and manipulate those around them to get what they want. We carry those same base desires into adulthood, only we rationalize those desires away behind any number of reasons we've learned to tell ourselves to be rid of the shackles of guilt and the responsibility we have to ourselves and others to be honest.
I would be disinclined to believe someone who told me they omitted the truth, no matter how inconsequential it might have seen, because they respected me or cared about my feelings. It is the highest insult. I would have greater respect for someone who had the courage to brave the risk of telling me the naked truth, no matter how painful it might be, than to do otherwise out of desire to avoid the minor inconvenience of being the proverbial bearer of bad news or however they wish to explain it away.
It is never acceptable to lie. It is always best to express what you truly think of the actions and beliefs of another. I regard those who strive to do so far more highly, knowing I can rely upon them to be sincere despite the discomfort it may bring.
I would be disinclined to believe someone who told me they omitted the truth, no matter how inconsequential it might have seen, because they respected me or cared about my feelings. It is the highest insult. I would have greater respect for someone who had the courage to brave the risk of telling me the naked truth, no matter how painful it might be, than to do otherwise out of desire to avoid the minor inconvenience of being the proverbial bearer of bad news or however they wish to explain it away.
It is never acceptable to lie. It is always best to express what you truly think of the actions and beliefs of another. I regard those who strive to do so far more highly, knowing I can rely upon them to be sincere despite the discomfort it may bring.
Written By Reigna
June 19, 2018, 6:35 p.m.(1/16/1009 AR)
People are liars. This is a truth that I have come, painfully, to accept.
Personally, I cannot abide dishonesty which makes it difficult, because I tend to like people.
This is not to say a lie has never passed my lips. I have lied. I was a child, and children are among the most prolific liars there are. Youthful lies tend to be lacking in malice, like those often found in those of an older age. Now that I think about it, seeing those words written, I would hazard that a vast majority of lies told by adults are also lacking in malice. It is an interesting consideration... the motivations of lies. As an adult I have caught myself lying to others and the guilt is there when I realize it. I try to tell myself it is a harmless thing. 'I was just trying to be polite'. That is my most often excuse. Someone suggests something I find offensive or ridiculous, and I thank them for their input. Am I truly grateful? No. Likely I am irritated with their contribution because I consider it silly or obtuse. But I would never, ever, dream of saying that. Of cutting them down in such a way.
Is this a harmless lie? There is a certain social contract that we maintain in society. Pleasantries to be observed, respect shown to our fellows. These are, in most cases, considered obligatory and from a young age, because of the ubiquity of this behavior, we absorb and internalize these rules from a young age. These lies are seemingly, an integral part of the fabric of social interaction. But should they be?
I consider one person that I know well, whose name will not be mentioned, that flies in the face of such conventions. Some of my interactions with this person drive me absolutely insane because of the things that they say, opinions that they voice that rend that fabric to shreds. Because they do not ascribe to the idea of maintaining that obligatory politeness. Sometimes this person makes me want to scream. Other times I find them joyously refreshing in their utter acceptance of who they are, and adherence to their own principles.
Is it ever acceptable to lie? Is it better to be polite or to express what you really think of the actions and beliefs of someone else?
Personally, I cannot abide dishonesty which makes it difficult, because I tend to like people.
This is not to say a lie has never passed my lips. I have lied. I was a child, and children are among the most prolific liars there are. Youthful lies tend to be lacking in malice, like those often found in those of an older age. Now that I think about it, seeing those words written, I would hazard that a vast majority of lies told by adults are also lacking in malice. It is an interesting consideration... the motivations of lies. As an adult I have caught myself lying to others and the guilt is there when I realize it. I try to tell myself it is a harmless thing. 'I was just trying to be polite'. That is my most often excuse. Someone suggests something I find offensive or ridiculous, and I thank them for their input. Am I truly grateful? No. Likely I am irritated with their contribution because I consider it silly or obtuse. But I would never, ever, dream of saying that. Of cutting them down in such a way.
Is this a harmless lie? There is a certain social contract that we maintain in society. Pleasantries to be observed, respect shown to our fellows. These are, in most cases, considered obligatory and from a young age, because of the ubiquity of this behavior, we absorb and internalize these rules from a young age. These lies are seemingly, an integral part of the fabric of social interaction. But should they be?
I consider one person that I know well, whose name will not be mentioned, that flies in the face of such conventions. Some of my interactions with this person drive me absolutely insane because of the things that they say, opinions that they voice that rend that fabric to shreds. Because they do not ascribe to the idea of maintaining that obligatory politeness. Sometimes this person makes me want to scream. Other times I find them joyously refreshing in their utter acceptance of who they are, and adherence to their own principles.
Is it ever acceptable to lie? Is it better to be polite or to express what you really think of the actions and beliefs of someone else?
Written By Lucita
June 19, 2018, 5:54 p.m.(1/16/1009 AR)
Relationship Note on Alaric
Lunch with the King. He is as charming and witty as ever mixed in with common sense, wisdom and wicked sense of humor that I quite enjoy.
Written By Astraea
June 19, 2018, 5:32 p.m.(1/16/1009 AR)
Relationship Note on Quenia
My cousin. I saw how moved you were the day before and it as saddening. Heart-wrenching to watch you suffer in any manner but most especially in a way that I couldn't comfort you. The beautiful thing about the freedom of choice is that you get to work through this however you want and the people who love you will remain by your side still.
You're an amazing woman through and through and the ordeal you're going through will pass but I can tell you now that your feelings may never be resolved and I think, like myself and no doubt many others, that there will always remain a certain mixture of emotions when thinking of him.
You're an amazing woman through and through and the ordeal you're going through will pass but I can tell you now that your feelings may never be resolved and I think, like myself and no doubt many others, that there will always remain a certain mixture of emotions when thinking of him.
Written By Aviana
June 19, 2018, 4:57 p.m.(1/16/1009 AR)
Today I went and spoke with Aleksei, I brought him water and broth and I has known that he had a child and he broke his oaths that he took the the faith so that he could be with his son. But the more I sat their and listened to his words the more confused I became and shocked I became, I am shocked and angry to say the least. I hope that Limerance will except his penance cause the things I heard I find my mind not at ease.
Written By Iseulet
June 19, 2018, 4:36 p.m.(1/16/1009 AR)
Today, I am honored to help Archscholar Wylla of Jayus host the Shrine Destruction ceremony. I look forward to seeing her and Sparte's ideas manifest and I hope to meet new people and see everyone show their creative side.
In other news, I now have a cat and absolutely no regrets. He gets along just fine with the puppy even though it is obvious he is now the Emperor of The Empyrean.
In other news, I now have a cat and absolutely no regrets. He gets along just fine with the puppy even though it is obvious he is now the Emperor of The Empyrean.
Written By Riagnon
June 19, 2018, 4:13 p.m.(1/16/1009 AR)
~/ If you go out in the woods today,
You're sure of a big surprise.
If you go out in the woods today,
You'd better go in disguise.
For every bear that ever there was,
Will gather there for certain because...
Today's the day the teddy bears have their picnic. /~
You're sure of a big surprise.
If you go out in the woods today,
You'd better go in disguise.
For every bear that ever there was,
Will gather there for certain because...
Today's the day the teddy bears have their picnic. /~
Written By Roxana
June 19, 2018, 12:07 p.m.(1/16/1009 AR)
Relationship Note on Eirene
"When in doubt, blame your sibling" she says.
I love you.
I love you.
Written By Quenia
June 19, 2018, 10:33 a.m.(1/16/1009 AR)
I attempted to attend the Valardin Snow Games last night. I figured watching a bit of fun, since I wasn't fealty, would be a good way to get my mind off of things. I had a splendid time talking to Marquessa Simone Greenmarch and Marquis Marius Greenmarch, but it wasn't before long that I was overcome with emotion and had to leave. Not because of either of them, but because I was recalling my time at Lucita's wedding and when I started a snowball fight with Princess Valencia and Aurelian.
I couldn't stay. I admit, with no shame, that I alternate between a varying number of emotions - which might sometimes end in tears.
I know, in time, I will start to feel better, but I would that it'd come sooner than later.
Think if I partake in a bit more reckless abandon that it wold speed that along?
I couldn't stay. I admit, with no shame, that I alternate between a varying number of emotions - which might sometimes end in tears.
I know, in time, I will start to feel better, but I would that it'd come sooner than later.
Think if I partake in a bit more reckless abandon that it wold speed that along?
Written By Eirene
June 19, 2018, 10:12 a.m.(1/16/1009 AR)
Wisdom I leave to my children:
Don't ever get into an argument or discussion via people's White Journals. Just roll your eyes at their stupidity and leave it for future generations to roll their eyes at.
Weapons are your friends as long as you hold them the right way. People, on the other hand, it doesn't matter how you hold them - you might still get hurt. The less you hold on to them the better your chances are that won't happen.
When in doubt, blame your sibling. Even if it's out of character for them, it's expected of you.
Don't ever get into an argument or discussion via people's White Journals. Just roll your eyes at their stupidity and leave it for future generations to roll their eyes at.
Weapons are your friends as long as you hold them the right way. People, on the other hand, it doesn't matter how you hold them - you might still get hurt. The less you hold on to them the better your chances are that won't happen.
When in doubt, blame your sibling. Even if it's out of character for them, it's expected of you.
Written By Sina
June 19, 2018, 10:11 a.m.(1/16/1009 AR)
Today I've decided to visit the Shrine of Gild as I continue my tour of the shrines and holy places within the city. So far, I have visited the Shrine of Mangata, and her altar and statue on the beach, the Shrine of the Lost, and the Shrine of the Queen of Endings. It is a very small start, and I have much further to go, but I am determined to visit each and every one, that I might learn more about the Gods and pray.
So, on to Gild. Goddess of wayward travelers and pilgrims, Goddess of charity, Goddess of good fortune and prosperity. And so I go to pray.
So, on to Gild. Goddess of wayward travelers and pilgrims, Goddess of charity, Goddess of good fortune and prosperity. And so I go to pray.
Written By Kritr
June 19, 2018, 8:54 a.m.(1/15/1009 AR)
Our Lodge has been built here in the city along the area known as the Shaman walk. There are even walls inside and a stool to sit on for guests. It is a house, but not yet a Home. Hopefully with time it will become one.
Please note that the scholars may take some time preparing your journal for others to read.