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Parking Enforcement (IG Style)

Magpie Grayhope made it very clear that wagons parked in the wrong places are making a mess of his business. Thus the Iron Guard has come to enforce parking rules... Or maybe just let them park wherever and actually enforce laws that will make the the city safe. It really depends on the guards that come and what crime happens to be going on.

(OOC: PrP open to anyone who has business in the lowers. Crime very likely - if you want to BE the crime just show up! We can make it happen.)


March 13, 2019, 8:30 p.m.

Hosted By


GM'd By



Merek Sparte Elise Harper



Arx - Lower Boroughs - Crows Lane

Largesse Level


Comments and Log

There's a little birdy used by the guard in the lowers, one that doesn't mind coming running with tidbits of news if given the right silver reward afterwards. Thus the guard gets tipped off that Betsy the Butcher's cart is AGAIN blocking the alleyway behind Highway Robbery. A sigh and a group has been dispatched to go see if they can find Betsy and get her to move her cart.

On Crow's Lane the cart is just hard to see with just the butt poking out. It's blocking the entire ally-way with only enough room on either side for a child to squeeze through. That smell that Magpie had complained about waifs out gently also, mixing with the typical smells of the lowers.

Merek has come to see about how the patrols are doing, being here often as he is with the navy. He makes his way to look around as he's there.

Sparte opted to join Merek, striding along with him. He has been meeting with some of the people at the docks for other reasons and caught wind of this when Merek did. "I bet she is using the piss fumes to cure meat or something. Functional, not elegant."

Being newish to town, not really knowing who owns what, the White Haired girl is in the alleyway trying to get ghe back door open to the Highway robbery. She has a mask pulled up her face to about her mid nose. She saw the wagon keeping her out of sight for this and it seemed a good place to start. So she decended from the roof.

Harper heads in, having got the message. It wasn't all that long ago that she had left the Murder to head to the barracks, so she's treking back over the same streets that she just walked not too long ago. It earns her a few strange glances from some of the denizens of the street that just saw her go past a short time earlier. Catching sight of Sparte and Merek, she raises her hand in a wave then angles her path toward them. "Heya Sparte! Heya Merek! You hear about the cart too?"

Elise checked dexterity + stealth at difficulty 15, rolling 33 higher.

Harper has rolled a critical success!
Harper checked perception at difficulty 10, rolling 35 higher.

Sparte checked perception at difficulty 10, rolling 11 higher.

Merek checked perception at difficulty 10, rolling 5 higher.

The cart does smell a little bit like piss - and a LOT like rotting flesh. How could Betsy want to sell things like that? And who the crap would BUY it? These are all questions that a few passerbys are asking one another as they toss dirty looks at the cart. Another man, probably familiar to Harper as he works at the Murder of Crows throws his arms up upon seeing the cart. "I AM NOT CLIMBING OVER THAT THING."

Elise continues going about her business pulling more and more little metal tools from her loose bun of hair trying to find the right one for the job.

Harper spots the cart, then throws a frown over at the man, yelling, "You expecting me to climb over it then? Get some of the others inside and get them out here to pull this cart outta the way, then!" With a shake of her head, she moves closer to try to see if she can squeeze under or beside it to avoid getting in the middle of whatever is stinking it up so bad in that cart. Fortunately, she has her handy dandy copper scarf and tugs it up over her nose. About that time her eyes land on Elise, and she blinks in confusion trying to figure out what the woman is doing. Without even considering what happens next, Harper yells at her from behind the scarf, so it comes out a little muffled, "Hey! You there! This your cart?! Why're you crouching down outside my home?" She eyes the alleyway, trying to find a way to get closer to Elise.

Merek doesn't intervene at the moment, instead he takes a moment to look to Harper, "All alright?" he asks, as he moves then to follow Elise to see how she is oing also.

Elise checked composure at difficulty 25, rolling 5 lower.

Elise turns sharply to the sound of a voice shouting at her direction from the cart. That is probably not too smooth. She doesn't say anything she just slowly starts putting the little tools back in her hair.

Sparte lifts a hand towards Harper with a smile that fades a bit as he starts to smell what they're approaching. "Yeah, and now I've smelt it. Worse than old gravy." He falls in behind Merek, allowing his fellow guardsmen to take point as he glances around to see if there are any lookey-loos or troublemakers about. You know, other than the obvious.

The cart is right stuck there in the alleyway, and it's held firmly in place by wooden wedges under each wheel. Weirdly, from inside the cart comes a sharp sound and the cart wiggles side to side to press against Harper for a moment before pausing again like it had never moved.

Harper is torn for a brief few seconds as she looks from Elise to the wiggling in the cart. But this is her home, so she's determined to get past the cart any way she can. She calls back to Sparte and Merek, "Something's moving in the cart! And that woman back there was dragging out some kinda stuff from her hair and acting real suspicious!" Without further ado, she's going to climb into the cart, not planning to let a little thing like a cart get in her way of dealing with suspicious people around her home. But, she's not stupid, so she'll climb up in the front and try to see if she can yank whatever cover is over the cart out of the way without getting in the middle of it, first.

Elise sees Harper getting ready to climb the cart. Her eyes dart around the alley way looking for one of her usual escape methods. Up. Better to be prepared if she needs to flee.

"Oh," Merek looks between them all when he notes the situation, and he shifts so that Sparte can take point, "If you would, I will cover the routes," he says, while he makes to do all of that at the moment also.

Sparte gives an easy nod to Merek, reaching into his belt to pull out a small jar of a strongly minty smelling goo. He opens it, taking a finger swipe and dragging it under his nose. "Been a while since I needed this. Alright, I'll check it out." He bends to set the open tin down on the ground just, you know, in case anyone else needs it. Then from that crouch he hops up onto the end of the wagon next to Harper. "Is that you back there, Lady Peri?" Apparently he knows someone that fits the perp description.

With the covering on the cart flung off the meat is on full display for the guards. The stench rises up. More alarming though is that right in the middle of the meat is meat of a very different kind. Those familiar with the lowers might recognize Betsy the Butcher. She's laying among her wares looking quite dead. There isn't any other movement beyond Elise in the allyway, and the street traffic seems normal for the lowers.

Harper checked composure at difficulty 20, rolling 10 higher.

Elise checked charm + manipulation at difficulty 15, rolling 50 higher.

Sparte checked perception + empathy at difficulty 15, rolling 1 lower.

Harper checked perception + streetwise at difficulty 15, rolling 36 higher.

Elise shouts down the alley through her mask. "Why yes it is!" She starts walking towards the cart calmly. I droped a hair pin and then someone blocked me in with this cart. It smelled so bad I just stood back here!"

Merek checked perception + empathy at difficulty 15, rolling 5 higher.

Harper gives Sparte a strange look, then looks over at Elise, getting distracted for a moment, and saying skeptically, "What in the abyss would Lady something or the other be skulking around in an alley outside the Murder, Sparte? And if she is, then she's not up to any damned good, far as I'm concerned." She looks over at the woman and yells, "If you're down here doing things you oughtn't to, then stop it! Tired of having nobles get killed snooping into crap that's none of their damned business, Lady! Otherwise, show yourself and make nice!" When that cover comes off, Harper looks down immediately and has to do her best not to toss her cookies all over Sparte's toes. Managing to keep her cool, she looks back over to Elise suspiciously when she starts making her way over. Her nose twitches when Elise gives her explanation, but the story is just plausible enough that she can't really deny it either. She says, "Keep that scarf over your nose, then Lady. It's nasty smelling here." She turns her attention back to the cart, saying, "Damn, poor ole Betsy."

Sparte reaches for the tarp Harper had moved to cover things back up. Even with mint covering up most of the smell, this is still mighty unpleasant. "You wouldn't believe the places she has turned up. Or what she can keep in her hair." He speaks up as he gets the thing resecured. "Lady Peri, please listen to my fellow guard. She talks sense."

Kenna GM Roll checked dex(3) + streetwise(4) at difficulty 20, rolling 15 higher.

Harper checked perception + streetwise at difficulty 15, rolling 25 higher.

Merek checked perception + streetwise at difficulty 15, rolling 11 higher.

Elise checked perception + streetwise at difficulty 15, rolling 3 higher.

Elise pose calls out "What smells so terrible?" she gets a bit closer but still keeps a good ten feet away from the cart. "I did not think anything could smell so terrible!"

Sparte checked perception + streetwise at difficulty 15, rolling 7 lower.

Something has knocked the braces holding the wagon in place and under Harper and Sparte it starts to roll deeper into the allyway, towards Elise.

Elise checked dexterity + athletics at difficulty 15, rolling 19 higher.

Elise's eyes go wide as the cart starts rolling at her so she turns on a dime and starts sprinting the other way. "Shit."

Harper checked dexterity + athletics at difficulty 15, rolling 54 higher.

Eyeing Elise again, Harper can't help but give her hair a once over curiously. "Huh, never thought about sticking things in my hair. Then again, I'd probably stick it through an ear instead." With a little shrug, she turns back to try to help Sparte get the cover back over the body, adding, "I reckon we're gonna have to get this moved and down to the Inquisition so that Inquisitor Godric can start studying poor ole Betsy." But the wiggling catches her eye again, and she says, "Hey, did you move the cart, Sparte?" When she spots someone taking off from back of the cart, Harper doesn't hesitate. Chasing people down seems to be what she always ends up doing, so she tries to jump out of the cart, hoping to follow even with it moving. She does yell at Merek and point off toward the one running away, "Merek! We got a runner!"

Sparte checked dexterity + huge wpn at difficulty 20, rolling 24 higher.

Merek checked dexterity + athletics at difficulty 20, rolling 25 higher.

Kenna GM Roll checked dex(3) + ath(4) at difficulty 15, rolling 15 higher.

Kenna GM Roll checked dex(3) + ath(4) at difficulty 20, rolling 22 higher.

There is a blink from Sparte as the cart starts to move, but he manages to think on his feet. Or off his feet as the case may be, since his immediate instinct was to hop and land on the ground again. The motion with which he slips the staff off his back and extends it into one of the wheels of the cart is just as quick, almost like the staff did half the motion itself. It all looks clever, capable, smooth - until there is that jerk when the wheelspoke jerks into his staff and Sparte accidentally pops himself in the chin with his own weapon. "Aaah biscuits. I've got the crime scene, go take care of the runner!"

Harper checked dexterity + athletics at difficulty 20, rolling 45 higher.

Merek shifts on his hip so that he can chase, and he provides a nod to the others also. Seems he's pretty good at all this, at least.

The runner is booking it, but he's not fast enough. Both Harper and Merek are on the runner like white on rice. In the runner's attempt to dodge guard hands the runner manages to trip and goes sprawling. SURPRISE! It's Jerry The Pisser, that dude who was caught peeing on the Murder of Crows not all that long enough. "GET OFF ME! I DON'T KNOW NOTHING! I WAS JUST PEEING!"

Elise slides to a stop when she hears the jerking of the cart. Looking back to watch it grind to a halt. She decides to stay in character for now. "So now I am stuck here even longer?"

Harper's run. That's what Harper's do. So when the hooded figure takes off running, several things seem to set her nose twitching and she takes off instinctually, determined to do whatever it takes to apprehend the person running away. She's a bit busy to gauge it but she's dearly hoping that it's not a mountain man this time. That always complicates everything and Jyri's not with her tonight! But hey, Merek is with her. Flashing him a quick grin, she picks up the pace even more, her bravery bolstered a bit. The she spots Jerry, dropping to stick a knee in his back when he trips and says loudly, "DAMNIT, JERRY! WHAT IN THE ABYSS ARE YOU THINKING?!" This time it's settled, "Jerry, your luck's up. You're going to jail."

Sparte is a bit too distracted holding onto his staff and trying to figure out what he can wedge under a wheel so the thing won't roll again. So he still hasn't gotten a good look at 'Lady Peri' the alley captive. "Uh, well, I mean... You can walk out the other end, can't you? Isn't there a backdoor to the Murder or something? Oh, can you maybe get me something to stick under this wagon so it won't move again?"

Elise has rolled a critical success!
Elise checked charm + manipulation at difficulty 30, rolling 76 higher.

Merek does manage to flank so that Harper can move in on the man they're chasing, though besides doing that, he seems to be content with assisting the others also.

Elise looks around with quick motions, looking for anything to use to block the wheels so the cart won't roll again to relieve Sparte. Elise might be a sociopath, but Peri probably isnt? "Oh well I didn't think it would be safe for me to go through the back of a place like that!" She finally finds some logs to shove under the wheels. "There!" She keeps her face covered. That smell tho.

"Not YOU," Jerry cries out, going limp in the guard's hold. "I was just pissing... I sear, she was dead when I got there!" His voice is oh-so-whiny. He looks to Merek hopefully, like maybe he'd talk Harper into letting him go.

Merek checked composure at difficulty 15, rolling 3 lower.

Merek doesn't assist the man, though he does look between him and Harper. He doesn't know what to say about the man's comment, he's speechless.

Harper just grins at Jerry cheerfully. Her good spirits returning now that she's not smelling that cart and she managed to catch Jerry. "Yep, me, Jerry! Your favoritest guard in the entire world." With a snort, Harper looks over to Merek and shakes her head, saying, "We found him peeing against the Murder a few weeks ago, but he bolted and got away. Now we found him with a dead body. Reckon that's plenty to drag him down for some good, old fashioned questioning. I'm sure the Inquisition will wanna hear all about how he didn't kill the body he was hiding in the cart with." Dragging Jerry with her, she starts heading back toward Sparte (after making sure he's not going to run away again).

Sparte gets his staff free once the logs are in place, checking it for damage and letting out a relieved sigh when it looks fine. He slips it away and straightens up. "Go ahead and get through the murder, I'll find you later to ask some questions. Good night, Lady Peri." Attention shifts over to Harper with a wave. "I've got a bit of rope. If he gives you trouble we'll just toss him in the cart. Sir Merek, mind sending for my horse? She should be able to get this cart up to the Inquest alright."

Elise nods, "If you think that is a good idea, who am I to argue?" She waves a little bit and heads for the door to go through the murder of crows. "Just send me a messenger! I will make time to see you!" So she slips away since she was told to.

"BUT IT WAS JUST PISSSSSSSSSSS." As Jerry is dragged away.

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