Bastien just keeps glaring at Mae as she bounds off to, apparently, get a banjo. And then he starts gathering up his pages and stuffing them into his folio, as if someone else might come by to try and snatch one up.

Binky, an asshole crow, Gregory, an unassuming disciple arrive, following Aureth.

Thena glances over her shoulder at Daemon's shout and lets out a sharp little bark of laughter. "Sir Daemon, is that a /flag/?" She wheels back towards the center of the action, content that everything is properly set up for the fight of the age. "Fort! I am absolutely pro breakfast sandwiches. All breakfast sandwiches, all the time. DOWN WITH BANS!" This part, declaimed in a strong voice, at Calaudrin.

Thena drops a small rickety table with a griddle.

Mae gets egg, cheese and bacon breakfast sandwich from a small rickety table with a griddle.

To the park comes Esoka. Her expression could best be described as skeptical tolerance. She's just in time to catch Mae's exit, and she blinks. "Is there going to be a banjo?" She is concerned. Thena is shot a warm smile and quick, "Hello, Thena." Before she approaches Calaudrin. Looking extra, extra tolerant. "Gloria favor your...err...dancing." Is that even appropriate? She sounds unsure.

Fortunato raises his hands to clap. "Up with breakfast sandwiches. Up with eggs and other things! Commence battering to grave, grave justice, cousin Thena!"

Olenna, Maxene, Pellinor, Horse arrive, following Alarissa.

"When is the last time you even ate breakfast?" Aureth asks Fortunato in a particularly accusatory way.

Before Mae can get to playing banjo, she just has to start over towards the table, and the stack of sandwiches. "Mmmm..." she murmurs, as she reaches out to grab one. Nevermind she'll eat, like, three bites and be down with it. Free food.

Fortunato drops his hands. He eyes his brother carefully sidelong. "When's breakfast supposed to be, exactly?"

Some things are just too interesting to not go to and this duel is one of them as Alarissa slips her way into the park, dressed down and curious.

Aureth gets egg, cheese and bacon breakfast sandwich from a small rickety table with a griddle.

Ned is still looking at Calaudrin with a confused expression on his face. "But..." Cal waves his hand at him that he's to go help with the food. As people begin to cheer for the sandwiches, he projects his voice loudly. "No, no! DOWN WITH THE SANDWICHES! FOR AN INEXPLICABLE REASON!" He claps his hands at the end and has a little laugh, smiling broadly when Esoka arrives. "I hope she favors us. Otherwise one or both of us is going to break an ankle." But it's probably about time to start, so he waves a hand in Thena's direction. "Are you ready?"

"I lost a bet with a fellow soldier. Bought a round of ale, then a big chocolate cake. To punish myself." Daemon replies cheerily toward his commander, the one and only Guardian of the Breakfast. "So I made due with what I had..." Yes, it was a banana. Yes it was painted red. It was holding on /remarkably/ strong too. It must be quite ripe. "I'm behind you one hundred percent, commander! DEFEND OUR RIGHT TO EAT THINGS BETWEEN BREAD! HERE HERE!" He raises a fist, while his Greyhound scampers off to stand at the side of Alarissa inexplicably.

"You aren't playing the banjo, are you?" Esoka gives Calaudrin a wide-eyed look and head-shake that suggests she thinks this is a BAD IDEA. "Yes, don't break anything!" She leans into give him a quick kiss, for luck. Then eyes those sandwiches. "Will I betray your, err, cause if I have one of those?"

Fortunato also sidelong notices Mae's banjo. His arms fly up again. "Banjo!" He's just excited a moment.

"In the morning, Fort, when many people get up," Aureth says. He munches complacently on a sandwich without a care for what time of day it is right now, and sniggers a little at his brother's banjo joy.

"I like it. Better banana-flag than no flag, yeah?" Thena flashes a grin at Daemon and then fist-pumps at Fortunato's words, though adds, "Hopefully not too much battering. Aureth! My favorite Grayhope right now except for maybe Fort, hello!" When Calaudrin asks if she's ready she makes a big show of brushing imaginary dust off her forearms, then stalks towards the middle of the circle of onlookers. "Born ready."

Fortunato sniffs at Aureth. "I am up in the morning. Sometimes I am also up at night. All the time, me, awake and productive. Very, very productive," he adds, briefly, then waggles another wave over at Thena. "I've done nothing to deserve being your maybe favorite, but thank you! Gloria with and all that!"

If her dog is here that means Daemon must be here and the laden with child princess searches the man out and with a tch of her tongue after a lavishing off attention on her dog, Alarissa is making her way to Daemon and his little congregation of companions. "Over breakfast sandwiches?" She asks of him, with a smile, looking to the action soon to start.

"Are you guys really dancing?!" Mae calls over at Calaudrin and Thena. "Should I play?!" she asks, then looks around, to see if there's someone else playing.

The leggy, lithe figure of the Telmar lord comes into view as Percephon marches into the park and toward the dueling grounds where the epic dance-off in defense of breakfast sandwiches is allegedly going to take place. Unconventional duels? Check. Free food? Check. Opportunities to troll? Check. Which would perfectly explain his presence. The man cranes his head around toward all the faces, offering a small, wry grin that darkens his eyes. "Serious matter, this." He settles to sit on top of a picnic table, perched like a owl-eyed gargoyle.

"Oh, no. I only planning on doing /one/ terrible thing tonight. And that's this." Calaudrin calls back to Esoka as he approaches Thena. He rolls the sleeves up on his shirt. "Alright. So... I guess lets do this. You're better at sounding official, so if you want to rattle anything off, go for it." There's an offer to play the banjo from Mae and he looks to his opponent and shrugs. "Sure, why not?"

Big mistake, Calaudrin. Thena curves a slow toothy grin and turns, arms spread wide. "Friends! Citizens! Welcome! You may be thinking to yourself right now, well, why am I here? I will tell you why! To witness a duel between me, a representative of that which is right and good, by which I mean access to breakfast sandwiches at all times, and Lieutenant Estardes, who has a proven record of declaring random bans on the most delicious of foods! I have flouted this ban, for which he challenges me. We will see who the gods favor!" Yeah, this is what all that Whisper training has achieved. She gives a little mocking bow to her opponent, though she's clearly struggling to a hide a smile.

Calaudrin checked composure at difficulty 15, rolling 3 lower.

Killian doesn't come down into the lowers very often, mostly because it's a really, really long walk from the Ashford estates and he's not reputed to be the most energetic of sorts. He's dressed in his armor and wearing his swords, as he drifts into the park, looking around curiously and approaching towards the goings on.

Esoka looks deeply relieved that Calaudrin will not be showing off his banjo stylings, and she goes to find herself a place to spectate. If there is an anti-sandwich section, she cannot locate it, so she ends up standing next to Percephon. "Yes. Very serious," she deadpans.

Aureth snorfles through a laugh and then takes another aggressively large bite of his sandwich. He says something with his mouth full, which comes out more or less like, "Mm fff mmmfm!" He's helping.

Mae brightens, and sits up straighter, from her perch on the table part of a picnic table. Not the bench, where one ought to sit. She sets her sandwich aside, licks her fingers, then swings her banjo into her lap. "Whenever you're ready, Dame Thena!"

Calaudrin starts to laugh, he only barely hides it by pinching the bridge of his nose very tightly and covering his mouth. And by barely hides it, that means, he definitely doesn't hide it at all and ends up needing to take a deep breath. "Alright then." So, whenever the music begins to play, he'll give his limbs a shake and proceed with the dancing. Or what's supposed to be dancing? Is it riverdance? He puts his hands on his hips and begins to wildly kick his legs around.

Calaudrin checked dexterity + performance at difficulty 20, rolling 13 higher.

Wait, it's a dance off. Alarissa's browns furrow and she then she smiles, a glance to Mae as she position to play the banjo and reaching down to stroke along Elegance's back, settles in to enjoy the dance off.

Percephon nods, looking terribly long-faced and grave, looking sidelong at Esoka. "Breakfast should only be consumed during breakfasting hours. Anything resembling breakfast foods that dare masquerade as sandwiches should not be consumed past noon. That's simply --" he thumbs his glasses back into place, snorting. "Foolishness."

Thena checked dexterity + performance at difficulty 20, rolling 3 lower.

Fortunato gets egg, cheese and bacon breakfast sandwich from a small rickety table with a griddle.

Fortunato takes one of these breakfast sandwiches and turns it over in his hands. He makes as if to pull it apart. Like a scientist.

Thena lets Calaudrin get started without music, then gives a little nod to Mae to play once a slightly awkward amount of time has gone by. Then she leaps into the cleared area and immediately does not stick the landing, forced to hop backwards several steps, "Mother/fucker/," before going into something that vaguely resembles a tavern jig. As in, if you're drunk it might look okay? Maybe?

Mae checked dexterity + performance at difficulty 15, rolling 9 higher.

Calaudrin checked composure at difficulty 15, rolling 2 lower.

Calaudrin checked dexterity + performance at difficulty 20, rolling 4 lower.

"Ooookay... I'll start you two slow! Since, uh-... you know. Just to be nice?" Mae offers up, and then she starts picking at that banjo like she actually knows what she's doing. "Anyone who knows this one, sing along!" she calls. But doesn't sing herself. Just starts a pluckin'...

Percephon checked charm + performance at difficulty 15, rolling 2 higher.

Killian blinks a couple of times as he sees the 'duel', looking a bit confused. He gives a small little smile, but turns, moving to head back towards the entrance to the park.

Aureth finishes off his sandwich -- mmmm, delicious grease -- and begins to clap and stomp in time to the banjo music, and then puts his voice enthusiastically to the song, why not.

Aureth has rolled a critical success!
Aureth checked charm + performance at difficulty 15, rolling 57 higher.

Esoka checked charm + performance at difficulty 15, rolling 5 lower.

This would go better if Calaudrin could stop laughing. But he can't. When Thena doesn't stick the landing, he's trying to do a very impressive twirl and yet... it doesn't happen because he's giggling. Man giggling. He ends up stumbling and nearly tripping all over himself as he tries to keep with the pace of the song. Even though it's not really going very fast.

"Yes! It is a matter of...principle." Esoka manages to agree with Percephon. As the contest begins, she attempts to clap along to the banjo in time. The wild kicking from Calaudrin may earn more skeptism, but then she remembers she is being supportive and redoubles her clapping. She attempts to bang out a jaunty beat on a table, but mostly it just ends up as banging.

Fortunato stops prying his sandwich apart. His attention flicks from the dangerous jigging to Aureth. He stares for a moment.

Thena checked dexterity + performance at difficulty 20, rolling 11 higher.

Percephon sings along - loudly. But, he is barely on-key and and doesn't know all the words at all. At least, thankfully, Aureth starts singing and the entire world weeps with joy. Even Percephon turns to stare in wonder for a long moment.

Thena gets in her groove...perhaps it's that simple Elysian magic of Aureth's bar song singing that inspires her...and manages to rattle off a series of very jaunty little steps, including a couple of vaguely threatening-looking hops in Calaudrin's direction. She is able to spare a quick glance around at everyone joining in before looking down at her feet, perhaps hiding a smile.

Calaudrin checked dexterity + performance at difficulty 20, rolling 1 higher.

Mae checked dexterity + performance at difficulty 15, rolling 16 higher.

Well, that goes plenty well enough. But who needs /slow/ music in a dance contest. So Mae picks it up a little bit. "NO words to this one! Less you wanna make 'em up...!" she calls, with a grin sent over to Aureth. Surely, with a voice like that...

Hey now! Calaudrin has to dance backwards and away from Thena when she starts threateningly hopping towards her. But he doesn't fall over so after taking a moment, he starts to furiously tap his feet against the ground. It sounds better when you're on a hard surface and are wearing tap shoes, but a person has to make due with what they have.

Thena checked dexterity + performance at difficulty 20, rolling 10 higher.

Aureth checked wits + performance at difficulty 15, rolling 2 higher.

"I'm really out of practice at cheap street theater," Aureth says, but he tries to spin on. "It's the war of the sandwich?" he sings, well-voiced but still totally awkward and on the verge of laughter, "A war of bacon and eggs? Here's a song about bacon and coffee, down to the dregs?"

Even Thena looks a little bit startled at how well she's doing, feet planting themselves precisely in pattern on the dirt and worn grass. With an air of growing confidence she starts prance-skipping around the perimeter of the crowd, clapping her hands in an invitation for everyone to join in.

Calaudrin checked dexterity + performance at difficulty 25, rolling 5 lower.

"Dance harder!" Esoka yells at Calaudrin. Encouragingly. Well, loudly. She sounds like she's getting invested, at least.

Thena checked composure at difficulty 15, rolling 1 lower.

Fortunato calls, "Dance until the walls shake!"

"Dance for the sanctity of lunch!" Cheers Percephon, enthusiastically.

Alarissa makes her way to where Percephon sits, easing to take a seat beside him and still watch the ongoing with a smiles. "Better than swords yes?" he asks him.

It's almost as if Calaudrin /can't/ dance at all! This is a really incredible development. The tap dancing, hands on hip thing goes well until he trips and lands on knees. Which is undoubtedly going to leave marks there later. Still, he clambers to his feet because this spectacle isn't over yet. Dance harder? For the sanctity of lunch?! Yes, he can do that. So Cal just doubles down on this awful display of footwork.

Thena checked dexterity + performance at difficulty 25, rolling 4 lower.

By god, the banana flag is waving as hard as it can for Thena's moves. If you could call them 'moves'. Daemon between his boisterous cheering for his commander and sparing a glance back to Alarissa. "Why yes, over breakfast sandwiches. Personally I very much so like sandwiches. So I would also like my commander to win. WIN THENA. WIN YOUR ENTIRE HEART OUT!"

Inspired, Thena skips through the crowd to where she's left a long ironwood staff adorned with a knot of dragonweep leaning against the griddle table. She grabs this and darts back into the circle. Lifting it on high, she twirls it over her head...and manages to whiff herself on the ear, wincing. "Ow, gods /damn/ it!" Sure, she's Godsworn. Honest.

Thena wields Knothole Stave.

Mae flashes a ridiculous grin over to Aureth, seeming all too happy to see the Archlector back in his native state. "Alright!" calls Mae, as she looks back over. "You two are doing-... Great!" she says. Totally great. She's giggling as she continues to pick at the strings. "Now let's put the hammer down!" she cries out, and then the song changes again. Now this? This is fast.

Calaudrin has rolled a critical success!
Calaudrin checked composure at difficulty 15, rolling 12 higher.

Fortunato funnels his hands around his mouth to bark, "The breakfast sandwiches aren't worth the sanctity of your head, Thena!"

Percephon laughs in short, amused chortles, looking over toward the other side when Alarissa nears him. "Yes, much better than swords. Also, sandwiches are a much worthier cause than stockings. Less fashionable, mind, but worthier." He leans in to admit around his cupped hand, "Tastier too."

Calaudrin checked dexterity + performance at difficulty 25, rolling 1 lower.

Esoka winces as Calaudrin trips. Momentarily concerned. But then he's up and doesn't appear to have done himself a grave injury, so she starts clapping again. She will clap all the way to the end.

Thena whacks herself in the head with a random staff she brought with her? Not a problem! Calaudrin doesn't even flinch! He's not so steady on his feet though, not after falling down and not after dancing as /hard/ as he possibly can around the staging area for the last fifteen minutes or so. He continues on, more frantic leg flailing and more pinwheeling.

Thena checked dexterity + performance at difficulty 25, rolling 5 lower.

She's got him on the run, boys! I guess you could say that? Thena's dancing has suddenly degraded into something like ecstatic hopping, probably because she's trying to manage this giant stave all of a sudden. In a final hail-Mangata she throws it high into the air. It twirls end over end and she...totally misjudges, and is forced to run out from under it with a high-pitched yelp. It lands with a puff of dirt. It's finally too much for the woman and she lets herself fall on her ass, throwing her head back and burbling with laughter.

Mae has rolled a critical success!
Mae checked composure at difficulty 15, rolling 12 higher.

Calaudrin checked composure at difficulty 15, rolling 1 lower.

"Far less bloody" Alarissa states, watching the hopping and staff throwing, Elegance resting her greyhound head on her knee while Alarissa absently lavishes affection. Down goes Thena and there's a glance to Claudrin with curiosity.

Mae, minstrel extraordinaire, manages to finish her song, even leaning away to avoid a swinging staff as she does. She's giggling, but she doesn't stop picking.

Calaudrin really can't beat, throwing your staff? Stave? Up into the air and nearly getting hit in the head with it again. He stops dancing and holds his hands up. "I concede! I concede! If only so we finish before one of us is seriously injured somehow. I WILL NO LONGER BAN BREAKFAST SANDWICHES. In fact, we'll sell some in the shop. But only in the morning and maybe for brunch, because I'm not a madman." He steps to where Thena is dying from laughter and offers her a hand up from the ground.

Fortunato draws his hand up, singly, as Calaudrin concedes. "Should breakfast sandwiches really be constrained by rules, though?

"Well -- " Percephon watches the conclusion of the dance duel, straight-faced, until he addresses Alarissa once more. "Yes, less bloody. But, someone was almost knocked out. Almost."

"What lawlessness are you planning to ascribe to sandwiches?" Aureth asks, with furrowed eyebrows.

"All of them," Fortunato tells Aureth, somberly.

When the laughing dies down...Thena looking sort of surprised at herself the whole time like it's something that doesn't happen to her all that much...she throws her arms in the air. "THE GODS HAVE DECIDED!" Poor gods. She takes Calaudrin's offered hand and hauls herself up, giving him the soldierly arm-to-forearm clasp. "Well fought. Oh shit, Sparte's going to kill me if I broke that staff."

Mae continues to idly pluck out a little tune as she watches, with a grin. "The Murder of Crows will now serve breakfast sandwiches!... In the afternoon and evening!" she declares.

Esoka eyes Calaudrin and Thena both narrowly as the contest comes to a close. Looking for blood. Even if this //wasn't// a duel to first blood, it got dodgy and flail-y at moments. When it finally, inevitably, concludes, her attempt at rhythmic clapping turns to applause. "That was...something!" She does not say what, but just keeps clapping. "Well fought...err...danced, Dame Thena."

"Why do you even have his staff?" Calaudrin looks over at the weapon incredulously after the soldier-bro-hug thing has come to a conclusion. Then he shakes his head and gives a little laugh. "I would discuss those points in detail Master Grayhope, but I am much too tired from my physical exertion." He brushes the dirty and dust off his clothes before beaming in Esoka's direction. He's a very happy loser apparently.

"WE ARE A BLESSED PEOPLE!" Daemon joins into the cheering with his arms thrown up, his homemade flag thrown somewhere into the crowd by his sheer excitement. "LONG LIVE DAME THENA, QUEEN OF THE DANCE!" The knight goes running laps across the park, his arms still held stiffly in the air as he basks in the glow of victory.

Fortunato raises both his hands. "Huzzah, wild Murder breakfast!" To Calaudrin, brightly, "You also danced wonderfully and on the side of law. I think. May you have the delight in your noble loss."

Alarissa regards the ongoings, then looks to Percephon. "Some days, it's good to capture this yes? Just a bit to tide one over through the not so delightful parts of the day and time?"

"Because I asked to borrow it?" Thena replies like it's a really dumb question, and goes to pick it up and check for damage. Luckily, none taken and she stands there, clutching the staff in one hand as Daemon goes clanking about the field in his victory laps. To no one in particular she remarks, "I think Sir Daemon's recent woundings have changed him a little." The corner of mer mouth is twitching upwards despite her solemn tone.

Mae is overheard praising Thena for: She didn't hurt anyone but herself!

"You were very...something!" Esoka tells Calaudrin, with one of those wide, toothy smiles. She doesn't elaborate on what /his/ something is, either. But she does say, "I love you." And kisses him, with feeling. In case he needs reassurane, after all that.

"Fought, er, danced well. Both parties equally impassioned to their cause." Percephon claps, politely, as a courtier ought to. Lips lips twinge into a grin, agreeably, "Yes. We need the less-than-serious ever so often."

Mae continues to struck, grinning as she watches the nonsense unfold. Daemon's running about, Thena's, uh, regal? Stature. She takes a moment to look around, to settle first on Alarissa, for a long gaze, then on to Percephon. She lifts her non-strumming hand to give a little wave his way.

Alarissa notices Mae's gaze and the Princess of Thrax inclines her head long and deep to the Harlequin, but doesn't come over, option to stay at rest, content to lay affection on her beloved pet, seperation makes hearts grow fonder and Elegane is very beloved.

Laughing, Aureth takes a message that's been handed off to him, and snorts at whatever he reads. "Good show, folks," he says, standing straight and dusting bacon grease and crumbs from his hands as best he can. "Duty calls. I'm glad to see that the gods have spoken so plainly in their support of the sandwich."

Binky, an asshole crow, Gregory, an unassuming disciple leave, following Aureth.