Festival of Death - Archlector's Q&A 2
July 30, 2020, 3:30 p.m.
Arx - Ward of the Compact - Shrine of the Queen of Endings
Comments and Log
1 Templar Knight guards, Sir Daniel the Beardless, a somewhat hapless Templar arrive, following Hamish.
Alena Sparks, unamused first mate, Silk, the Seafaring Spider, 1 Harlequin jongleur leave, following Evaristo.
Beakers, an austere raven wearing a purple ribbon arrives, following Orick.
Hamish steps out of the back room and heads over to the altar, then looks over the parishoners. "Okay. Does anyone have any questions?"
Someone in the back raises their hand.
Hamish nods, "You?"
The man says, "Where's the bathroom?"
Hamish shakes his head. "We don't have a bathroom here."
The man does the peepee dance, then moans, "Maybe I'll try the shrine of Mangata," and goes running for the exit.
Hamish calls after him, "That's not allowed!"
Beakers, an austere raven wearing a purple ribbon leaves, following Orick.
Someone else raises their hands.
Hamish nods to him. "Go ahead."
The man stands up. "Does the Queen watch me in the bathroom?"
Hamish makes a face but shakes his head. "No. For the most part the gods don't watch us individually. If, when you pass, you'd like to tell Death about your bathroom times then that is up to you, but she isn't watching."
The man frowns. "Are ghosts watching me in the bathroom?"
Hamish nods. "Probably." then looks to the rest of the crowd. "Anyone else have a question?"
Several people raise their hands.
Hamish narrows his eyes. "Anyone else have a question that doesn't involve bathrooms?"
Everyone's hands slowly fall.
Korka raises her hand, "When is the best day to plant corn?"
"Tuesday," says Hamish.
Korka looks very skeptical, "That's in the middle of the week. Corn seems like more of a Saturday kind of thing. Are you sure your last name wasn't Thatcher?"
Raymesin ducks into the shrine as people are asking questions; he pauses at Hamish's response, then smiles ever so faintly. "Where do babies come from?"
"Corn is Tuesdays. Flax is Fridays. And on Saturday you build barns and do a Morris dance," says Hamish. Raymesin's question gets a thoughtful nod. "Mommies." Then, "Usually. Sometimes cabbages."
Someone else tentatively raises a hand.
Hamish nods. "I hope this has nothing to do with bathrooms."
The woman shakes her head. "If the gods can be stated to be that than which nothing greater can be conceived, then where is the Dream itself in relation to the rest of the gods? Did Aion dream the other gods into existence? There is no fate, but do the divines plan? What exactly is the abyss and is it part of the dream, or is it the opposite of the dream or is it the lack of the dream? Also, where exactly _is_ the closest bathroom?"
Hamish looks down at his book, quietly closes it and says, "It's in Bell, Bookcases and More. Behind the counter. Good day, all! Don't forget to go to the finale ball this evening! There are no bathrooms, but it will be at night near the ocean, so no one will be around to judge you except for the ghosts." He then heads back toward his office.
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